The curious paradox is that when I accept myself as I am, then I change - Carl Rogers (1961)
All the hurt, difficulty and pain we carry, in our minds or hearts - the "internal dialogue" - the sense of holding all those things.
All that needs to go somewhere.
Counselling can be that place.
To take everything into such a place (a place where there's no judgement of either this "stuff" or of you) and to just allow it to be there, can be liberating, and allow a movement forward.
What is Person-Centred Psychotherapy &Counselling?
First it is important to emphasise that apart for certain exceptional circumstances detailed in the Frequently Asked Questions section, Counselling is confidential.
All the hurt, difficulty and pain we carry, in our minds or hearts, the internal dialogue, the sense of holding those things. All that needs to go somewhere. Counselling can be that place. To take them into that place, where there's no judgement of them or you, and just allow them to be can be liberating and allow a movement forward.
Psychotherapy and Counselling are a safe, boundaried, compassionate relationship and environment where you can explore your issues at your pace without fear of judgement. This then allows you to hold the issues you have explored and make them part of life, moving from a place of discomfort and tension over them to a place of acceptance and softening. That process may well then let other issues make themselves known and likewise they then be integrated.
Person-Centred Counselling is about the relationship between you and the therapist working together to build a relationship of trust. It gives you the opportunity to talk to someone who will be understanding, compassionate and empathic regardless of what you bring. It is a space where you are truly listened to, heard, met and your issues acknowledged how you experience them and be understood on your terms.
You may be living through depression, grief, anxiety, loss, dissatisfaction with life, or struggling to accept damaging events. You can benefit from entering into a two way relationship that aims to understand you and your needs and which helps them you better in your own terms.
Counselling gives you the opportunity to let an experienced and approachable trained professional support you and help you change in your circumstances or understanding of you issues. It is an opportunity to be truly heard and listened to, in an understanding, non-judgemental, compassionate and empathic atmosphere.
However the truth can be that Counselling isn’t necessarily easy. Turning to face the difficult and painful things in life or in therapy isn’t easy and can feel as if it's going against the grain and not right. However, doing so in a supportive non-judgemental environment can bring you change and to a more balanced, peaceful life.
It is important to stress that Counselling isn’t advice. You will not be given advice by me. That would place me in a position of knowing all about you and your issue and that isn’t what I, or Person-centred Counselling is about. You know your experience thoroughly and only you know what you need deep down. You may not feel you can access what you need currently. I can help you to work out your solutions to life's challenges and problems.
This isn't a ‘Quick fix’ to your issues. Some deeply held problems or issues can take a long time to surface and be faced safely. Person-Centred Psychotherapy believes you will know when it is right to tackle certain things and trusts you will go there when you are ready. The relationship between you and the therapist is the key building block here that allows your trust and confidence to grow, enabling you feel safe and free to share or explore whatever difficulty you may be experiencing, all in an atmosphere that is not going to judge you for what you share and feel. This gives you the dignity of allowing your feelings and experience to be true, not denied or minimised.
The relationship may well challenge you. Being non-judgemental and accepting as a Counsellor does not mean you won’t have things that don't make sense shown to you. Nor does it mean you won’t hear the Counsellor’s insight. They will, but, it will not be confrontational. It will be kind and caring in such a way that takes no dignity away from you.
Your Autonomy and Well-being in therapy are my first concerns. I will respect your pace and boundaries.
"If we can share our story with someone who responds with empathy and understanding, shame can't survive."
- Brene Brown
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